well the woman plays hardball, now she's gonna throw ya
  don't look down, there's no net below ya
  just last week she had a great time to show ya
  now you're nuthin and she don't wanna know ya

  you were monkeyin around and something when wrong
  now she's Faye Raye and you're King Kong
  the other chicks tell ya that ya gotta be strong
  then they dump ya like dirty water from a bong

  cause it's a whammin bammin feast or famine
  sometimes it's dry, sometimes it's jammin
  sometimes you get to do some body slammin
  other times ya make a fist and cram yer ham in

  threesomes and foursomes with her and her friends
  so many times that the memory blends
  you're in so deep that your whole life depends
  because she's in your blood like a case of the bends

  well you were runnin together and howlin at the moon
  singing to each other and stayin in tune
  so the sweet lovin sister says "I'll see you soon"
  then she avoids ya like a  dead raccoon

  cause it's a whammin bammin feast or famine
  sometimes it's dry, sometimes it's jammin
  sometimes you live a life of shit god damnin
  other times the magic is alakazzammin

  it's fun and fair games when the woman's in season
  she's teasin, she's pleasin, she's givin you a reason
  then the squeezin turns freezin, she pulls her knees in
  and kicks ya in the nuts like you committed treason

  well you're beggin, you're wheezin, there ain't no appeasin
  you try to be sensitive like  Mister Van Driessen
  you go "hummina-hummina" like  Jackie Gleason
  but no matter what you do your chances keep decreasin

  it's a whammin bammin feast or famine
  sometimes it's dry, sometimes it's jammin
  sometimes you get to do some body slammin
  other times ya make a fist and cram yer ham in

  it's a whammin bammin feast or famine
  sometimes it's dry, sometimes it's jammin
  sometimes you live a life of shit god damnin
  other times the magic is alakazzammin

  it's a whammin bammin feast or famine
  sometimes it's dry, sometimes it's jammin
  sometimes you're swimmin upstream like a salmon
  sometimes you oughta  get your head examined